Godwink/God wink: “An event or personal experience, often identified as coincidence, so astonishing that it is seen as a sign of divine intervention, especially when perceived as the answer to a prayer.” ~ wiktionary.org
The new word “Godwinks” quickly entered into the language meaning those little “coincidences” that aren’t coincidence, but instead, come from divine origin. ~ https://godwinks.com
Tomorrow, January 26, 2024, I will have open-heart surgery for Ascending Aorta & Aortic Valve Replacement. From conversations with medical personnel and fellow heart patients, I gather that I’m young for this type of procedure – my 50th birthday is Valentine’s Day (I am like fine wine 😉 ) – but I’ve known for years that this surgery was a possibility, so it didn’t come as a total shock that it is necessary NOW . . .
Most of you probably know about my auto accident in mid-August 2023 that resulted in my SUV being totalled. My vehicle spun around in the middle of the road (thankfully, no other cars were nearby), my airbag deployed, and I lost consciousness for a few moments.
I ended up in the ER with a deep laceration to my left ankle (almost down to the bone – but no tendons or ligaments were torn) from the brake pedal, and severe contusions from the seat belts and on my left leg where it impacted the dash. But nothing was broken. (#GodMoment) The paramedics who transported me commented on my abnormal EKG. I said that was normal for me, and explained my history of heart disease.
I was born with a congenital heart defect, and diagnosed as an adult with (bicuspid) aortic valve stenosis. So, I’ve essentially had heart disease all my life, and have been under regular cardiac care since adulthood. (Which tends to make me just a little bit blasé about many other things some find anxiety-inducing . . . such as the recent pandemic . . .)
The ER doctor debrided my ankle, gave me 8 stitches, and told me that any medical professional could take them out in about 2 weeks. Despite being able to tell that the laceration wasn’t healing properly (and before you ask, no, I do not have diabetes), I had my brother (a paramedic) take out the stitches after 16 days. Two of the stitches had already fallen out on their own & the outer edges of the wound had begun to heal around the stitches. But there was still this gaping, bleeding, seeping hole in my ankle where the edges of my skin hadn’t come together. Either because the wound was too deep (and needed inside as well as outside stitches), or God had another plan.
Looking at my accident with human eyes, it was bizarre, coincidental, and nonsensical. But looking at it through the lens of Faith, well, in hindsight, it has God’s Fingerprints all over it.
I returned to the ER to find out if they needed to restitch or what else they could recommend. The ER personnel were a bit baffled by the half-healed laceration, and told me to seek a podiatrist’s care. Family members recommended a great podiatrist, and so I began to see him. He was also a little baffled, but game to see me through. Multiple visits followed, almost weekly, with debriding & trying different RX, and even the application of silver nitrate. But this was the slowest-healing wound on a non-diabetic ever. (#GodMoment)
In mid-September, my parents, son, and I left on our planned 2-week trip to U.K. I was designated driver, my father preferring to sit in the backseat with mom and enjoy the scenery, while my son played navigator (and side-seat driver) in the front passenger seat. And I began to experience fatigue, occasional shortness of breath, and tightness in my chest. I wasn’t really concerned, because I had been experiencing these and other symptoms of long covid since recovering from a severe bout of the plague in July 2020. . . . And my ankle continued to play diva . . . (#GodMoment)
We returned home the end of September, roughly 6 weeks after my accident. I returned to the podiatrist and my unhealed ankle continued to baffle us. He proscribed a new treatment, a topical collagenase, which, of course, took several weeks to procure. The ointment helped and progress was made on the wound healing, but still too slow, so my podiatrist decided that I should have a skin graft.
I was all for this. By this time, it was 2 and a half months since my accident and I was DONE with doctoring my ankle. Because I would be under local anesthesia, I had to have cardiac clearance (ya know, because of the heart disease thing). #GodMoment
Well, okay then. Since, at the time, I had lost track of my cardiologist (he’d had a falling out with his practice partner & left that practice, but couldn’t inform his patients, who were “the practice’s patients”), so visited my PCP to try for the clearance that way. The DNP I saw that day, I’ve not been to for several years. She viewed my EKG & didn’t feel comfortable giving me clearance (even though she knows my condition), and recommended that I see my cardiologist. I told her I didn’t know where he was currently practicing (and, yes, before you ask, I HAD Googled several times searching for him). She told me his current practice location, gave me his phone number & shared that her mother is also a patient of his. #ItsAGodThing #GodMoment
Since he’s now located in Palm Beach County (I live in Broward), I checked to be sure he’s still covered on my insurance. Happily, his entire practice & associated hospital (JFK) is on my insurance plan. I made an appointment right quick. We were now in early November. I was thrilled to make that drive & even happier to see him. He’s been my cardiologist for almost 20 years, I trust and respect him, so was bummed at the thought of having to find and “train” another cardiologist.
We began the usual battery of tests (EKG, Echocardiogram, Stress). He wasn’t particularly happy with the results of my stress test, especially coupled with the fact of my lingering fatigue & tightness in the chest. So, on to the next level of testing in mid-December – a TEE (transesophegeal electrocardiography) – which wasn’t terribly concerning, and minor “surgery” – a cardiac catheterisation, which DID have concerning results – my need for surgery.
I was in slight shock. It took a few weeks for the reality of this to set in – that I would have to have some type of heart surgery. Whether it would be laparoscopic or open would depend upon several factors. The next step was to make an appointment for a consult with the cardiothoracic surgeon. My appointment with him occurred just after the new year, 2024. Meanwhile, I researched him, and made an appointment to see my cardiologist, to discuss with him the results of the TEE and cardiac cath, as well as his opinion of the surgeon.
During this process – once I discovered my need for surgery – one song in particular became my anthem and it whispers through my soul as least once a day: “Goodness of God” by CeCe Winans (https://youtu.be/9sE5kEnitqE?si=XfKj75rEkgPvRcMP). And scripture references such as Jeremiah 29:11-13 resound with me even more now. #GodMoment
My surgeon, Dr. Marcos Nores, is director of the cardiovascular services at HCA Florida JFK Hospital in Atlantis, Florida (Palm Beach County). My particular issue ~ bicuspid valve stenosis, requiring ascending aorta and aortic valve replacement surgery ~ are some of his specific cardiac interests and specialties. He has performed thousands of these procedures over the past 2 decades, and he has a warm bedside manner. Dr. Nores ordered a chest CT/CAT scan, to ensure we have as much information as possible going into the surgery. Meanwhile, the date was set for my surgery: Friday, January 26th, 2024; the day after my son’s 23rd birthday.
Every January, my church has a season of reconsecration, which includes 24/7 reading the Bible aloud from the platform in 30-minute shifts, closed only during service times and other scheduled events. I had a 1-hour slot scheduled at 10am on January 6th, and as I began my Bible reading, the background music from our All Night Prayer the night before was still playing. And “Goodness of God” came on. I paused my reading to sing along, and then I said, “Yes, I hear you, Jesus. – I will sing of the goodness of God.” #GodMoment
Following the scan, his consultation with my cardiologist & with the cardiologist who performed my heart cath, Dr. Nores determined that not only did I need repair to my ascending aorta (hard PVC-type tube), my aortic valve needs replacing. And I am not a candidate for laparoscopic surgery – it will be open-heart. Since I don’t want to have to repeat the surgery in a decade or so, I chose to go with a mechanical valve, instead of a tissue valve (which would need replacing in about 10 years or so). It means blood thinners for the rest of my life, but it’s a small price to pay for a functional heart.
When I went to the hospital on Wednesday, the 23rd for all of my pre-op testing and blood draws, my EKG was perfect, textbook. For the first time EVER in my life. Almost as if it knows it will be fixed and is showing off. #ItsAGodThing #GodMoment
I can see clearly God working through all of this – even using the bizarre circumstances of my auto accident. Throughout my life, He has, indeed, been faithful, and so, so good. He has given me calm and deep peace about my surgery. He is in total control. He created this body – this heart. He has a plan for me, and I firmly believe He is not finished with me yet, here on earth. He will keep me in perfect peach throughout the rest of this journey, because my mind is fixed on Him. #GodMoment