Category Archives: Musings

Render Unto Caesar…


DISCLAIMER: If you support Rowan County, Kentucky Clerk Kim Davis’ refusal to issue same-sex marriage licenses, you may not want to read this post. It might anger you.

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If you make the choice to enter the political arena, you should understand a couple things up front:

  1. If elected, you hold a POLITICAL position that IS NOT subject to your personal or religious beliefs;
  2. That POLITICAL position may eventually require you to perform a duty with which you disagree.

If you’re an ELECTED official, you have the responsibility to stand for and represent your constituents, regardless of your personal feelings and religious convictions. I’ll go so far as to recommend that if you’re unable to tolerate and respect views – and carry out the laws – that oppose your own, you might want to avoid entering the political arena entirely.

In light of this, I believe Rowan County, Kentucky Clerk Kim Davis made the wrong choice. She’s an ELECTED (aka, POLITICAL) official. So deciding that her religious convictions won’t allow her to fulfill her job as a POLITICIAN (essentially), is poppy-cock. One could make the argument that when she ran for election as county clerk in 2014, (and during the 24 years she served as a deputy under her mother, the previous county clerk – apparently nepotism is legal in Kentucky government offices) same-sex marriage wasn’t legal nationwide, and there was no way she could’ve envisioned it would become law during her tenure as clerk. If that’s the case, perhaps she shouldn’t have run for political office… especially in light of her religious beliefs. Aspiring politicians need to be able to see the forest as well as the trees – they need to be able to think analytically, explore the “what ifs” of the future of politics.

And as she’s made this a religious debate, she’s actually defying scripture (available HERE, in whatever version you prefer): Luke 20:20-25 (ESV): “So they watched him, and sent spies, who pretended to be sincere, that they might catch him in something he said, so as to deliver him up to the authority and jurisdiction of the governor. So they asked him, ‘Teacher, we know that you speak and teach rightly, and show no partiality, but truly teach the way of God. Is it lawful for us to give tribute to Caesar or not?’ But he perceived their craftiness, and said to them, ‘Show Me a denarius. Whose image and inscription does it have?’ They said, ‘Caesar’s.’ He said to them, ‘Then render to Caesar the things that are Caesar’s, and to God the things that are God’s.’

In other words: Kim Davis is a POLITICIAN, in “Caesar’s” (aka, the US) government. Unless marriage licenses have changed since I was married in 2000, the state and issuing county are listed at the very top of the license. The clerk’s name is listed at the bottom, as the GOVERNMENT representative. It has NO reflection on the clerk himself/herself. The clerk is just a sexless name on a piece of paper. Ms. Davis is only responsible for signing and delivering the legally-obtained license. And I don’t believe that’s in violation of God’s law. Even Jesus taught that we are to give Caesar (Government) his/its due. And “Caesar” (the U.S. Supreme Court, in this case) has decided to interpret the Equal Protection Clause of the 14th Amendment to mean that “the fundamental right to marry is guaranteed to same-sex couples” just as it is to opposite-sex couples. THAT is “Caesar’s due.”

If Kim Davis was pastor of a church, THEN she could refuse (hopefully in a respectful manner) to provide “Holy Matrimony” to same-sex couples with her religious convictions as foundation for her refusal. Refusing to hand over a legally-applied-for marriage license to same-sex couples, in accordance with her JOB, her position as a POLITICIAN, simply because it’s contrary to her religious convictions, is extremism and attention-seeking.

If I was a county clerk, I like to think I’d be obedient enough to “Caesar” (and to God) to perform my duties as dictated by my employer (government). And if I disagree with them strongly enough, there 3 options available, as there are to Ms. Davis:

  1. Comply with the law, respectfully voicing my objection, understanding that God will not hold me accountable for obeying a lawful order;
  2. Recuse myself (as ELECTED officials have done in other jurisdictions), allowing my deputies or another department to handle the marriage licenses;
  3. Resign.

Simple solutions without all of the drama. Why is there so much drama? Why must it be one extreme or the other? Why can’t we accept and tolerate each others’ opinions and convictions without making every issue a battleground? And that includes allowing people to make their own (legal) decisions and mistakes, without giving into the desire to cause controversy and cast stones. Pick your battles, people; we are – NONE OF US – without sin.

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Filed under Life, Musings, Politics, Writing

The Anticipation of Waiting


My friend (er…at least I THINK we’re friends…we talk, so…) and fellow writer, Matthew Eaton posted this week on his blog something that got me thinking (shocking, I know): In his post titled Embrace Uncertainty and Find Peace in Silence Matt talked about the personal growth that can result from being uncertain and uncomfortable, and how to find comfort in uncertainty and the silence sometimes required by patiently WAITING for a response from people or from life. Reading this, I squirmed and hunched my shoulders in DISCOMFORT.

But, interest peeked, I read the entire post. It was very insightful. Humans are not the most patient of creatures. (Funny enough, I don’t think Matt once mentioned the word “patience” – and yes, I did reread his post, just to be sure. But that’s what kept jumping out at me: PATIENCE.) Perhaps you, Dear Reader, ARE a patient person. (Kudos to you!) Patience IS NOT one of my more admirable qualities. I realize this about myself, and when I’m impatient about something, I TRY to play it cool…distracting myself with another activity to pass the time…like sleeping…and often, I’m still unsuccessful…but the learning continues…

Most of our lives involve waiting. In the midst of sharing with Matt my thoughts on his post, I had an epiphany: If we could do EVERYTHING in our own time, at our own will, then perhaps those things we most want out of life – or ourselves – wouldn’t be so important to us upon the procuring. Almost as if the waiting, the anticipation of being able to finally have what we want, makes it all the more valuable and appreciated.

Anticipation

Anticipation

Okay, maybe you, Dear Reader, had this epiphany at a young age. But I’ve always been a bit of a late bloomer (*cough* hard-headed *cough*), so this “epiphany” hasn’t ever presented itself to me in such a positive, obvious manner before. It’s always been more like, “What?! I have to wait?? BUT WHY??!!” Just ask my mother what my favorite phrase was from a young age.

Go on ask her. I’ll wait right here.

*Checks watch, hums and taps fingernails on the desk*

Never mind. I can’t wait that long. I’ll tell you myself. It was: “But I WANT it!” Even a very young Wendy hated to wait. When we’re impatient, we make mistakes…often, those mistakes are life-altering. And this brings up an unpleasant memory: 4-year-old me, tempted with chocolate by a 12-year-old boy who touched her in places and in ways he had no business violating and penetrating. Afterward telling her not to tell anyone. Which of course she did. And I wonder, was that the greed and impatience of a little girl for a sweet? Or merely an innocent lured by an older “friend,” someone she trusted and who knew better, someone who should’ve protected her? I don’t blame myself anymore. But sometimes…

This impatience led me to: 1) date a lovely boy who was emotionally abusive (lovely to look at, not such a lovely personality when he didn’t get his way); 2) a failed marriage (because I married a different physically lovely man who wasn’t good for me – not abusive, just neglectful and apathetic; abusive in its own way) and single-parenthood; not realizing my dream of being published IN PRINT until last year…though that one may have been more a matter of procrastination and low self-confidence than impatience. Just to name a few examples.

So fast-forward several decades (that makes me sound older than I usually feel!) to now. At 41, I’m still as impatient as ever. My guardian angelBut I like to think I channel it, control it better than I did in my youth and 20s. For one thing, I’m finally beginning to reach some of the goals I set for myself way back when. In addition to being a published writer/author, I’m also being paid to READ!!! How awesome is THAT!! 🙂 It’s an honor to put to good use those years of education and experience editing and proofreading fellow authors’ manuscripts in preparation for publication. (I can now cross that off my bucket list.) And I have a good, bill-paying, day job as a Crime Analyst in county government. (Another tick off the ole bucket list.)

My years as a single parent (impatiently waiting for him to GROW UP ALREADY!…JK…no really, grow up, son!!) are starting to pay off: my kiddo is a tall, handsome, brilliant (smart-mouthed, frustrating, opinionated…umm, er…*ahem*) affectionate, 14-year-old young man, on the cusp of manhood. And high school (*groan*). And though parenthood never ends, he’s becoming more independent (like fixing his own food…sometimes! YAY!) and capable of great things. Everything I could’ve wanted for him…the ADHD and Asperger’s mix is just one aspect of his charming personality.

So. What do I wait for now? I’m glad you asked. Now I wait (and work toward) financial independence (and all that comes with it), student loan debt forgiveness (meanwhile, paying them down), an intimate, adventurous relationship with a lovely man (read: SEX!…if it’s in the cards), the time and means to travel the world attending Book Fairs, haunting bookstores, meeting IRL (for you non-techies, that means “In Real Life”) friends I’ve made through the vehicle of social media, and my publisher, Booktrope.

And while I wait, I’m determined to put my time to good use. Growing in experience and proficiency as an analyst, continuing to (voraciously) read, edit, proofread, write, build my brand, save money, and cultivate friendships. Oh, and, work to not be so impatient. 😉

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Filed under Bucketlist, Life, Musings, Writing

Guest Post – You Write Funny by Eric Turowski


Today I’m pleased to host fellow Booktrope author, Eric Turowski, writer of horror, suspense, and thrillers. His newest release, Inhuman Interest is available NOW.

Welcome, Eric!

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While I tend to put a lot of humor in my books, especially the latest one, Inhuman Interest, I’m not what most people would consider a funny person. Spontaneously funny people, I think, are to be admired. In my case, I don’t have a quick wit, or a snappy personality or even remember jokes that well.

In addition to not being naturally funny, my personal sense of humor is somewhat skewed. It takes a lot to make me laugh, generally. Yet the stupidest thing can set me off. Like those Can-Am motor trikes–Spyders. Especially the green one, the one that doesn’t look so much like a “spyder” as a three-wheeled frog. Why do I find them hysterical? I don’t know. When I start to snicker at one, my fiancée rolls her eyes.

So when I write humor, I stick to the stuff I know is pretty much funny to everyone. Even if you don’t admit it to yourself. These are, broadly characterized, falling down, very old people swearing, snarky one-liners and fart jokes.

Why is it funny when people fall down? A better term for this might be slapstick, but I’m no real student of comedy. Maybe I’m sick, but if this is true, it’s genetic. I got it from my mother. Think about it, though—would we have twenty-five seasons of America’s Funniest Home Videos if we didn’t enjoy seeing people spin wildly out of control, crash into stuff and fall down? Maybe it’s sort of an instinctive sense of relief that it isn’t us doing the falling.

When very old people swear, especially little old ladies, it’s funny. This is probably because in our minds, we think of oldsters as kind, giving grandparent figures. That sweet little old lady, that kindly little old man, and the like. Upon letting loose, with the vocabulary of a sailor, the juxtaposition of sweet and foul is somehow irresistibly funny. This is why Betty White’s star is on the rise all the time, I figure.

Snarky one-liners, in my writing, are situational and character-driven. Sometimes, when I’m lucky, they just pop out in the dialogue. More frequently, they have to be crafted, re-written, reconsidered and slept on. They are a necessary part of the action, breaking up the horror or suspense to keep the story moving quickly forward. On occasion, these one-liners also act in place of a few paragraphs of exposition. Once again, the use makes the story surge forward.

And fart jokes. George Carlin was right when he said farts are funny. They are funny in their own right, natural comedy mines that go off unexpectedly. When you have something that humorous to begin with, a little description goes a long way. I often use musical terms to describe the sound, like glissando, fortissimo and embouchure. Using sophisticated, classy two-dollar words to capture the essence of flatulence cracks me up. I literally sit at the computer and laugh. At that point, I figure it’s funny. Either that or I need therapy.

I don’t include black humor in the list of fool proof funny stuff. Black humor isn’t really meant to be laugh-out-loud funny as much as it is to break tension. Lennie (the late, great Jerry Orbach) on Law & Order always delivered the best dark humor lines as a close to the opening scene. Ironic, wry, amusing, yes, but as viewers we also understand that nobody is really laughing at murder. Sure, this kind of dark humor usually comes in the form of a zingy one-liner, but given the overall dark tone of the books, I keep this in reserve, using it as a characterization tool rather than a go-to funny.

You can see what I mean by checking out Inhuman Interest (Story By Tess Cooper #1). Hopefully, you’ll get a few belly laughs during the suspense. Either that, or recommend a good psychologist.

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Eric Turowski headshot cropped

Newspaper founder, bookstore owner, artist, musician, and man-about-town Eric Turowski writes lots of mixed-genre books when he’s not too busy playing laser tag with Tiger the Cat and his fiancée Mimi deep in the Central Valley of California.

You can learn more about Eric at www.ericturowski.com.

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